My Journey

Finding Freedom: A Journey from Pain to Purpose

My experience with school and ballet was one of rigidity, control, and an overwhelming sense of restriction. There was little room for personal expression or autonomy, and emotions were something to be hidden rather than acknowledged. I learned early on to mask my pain—both physical and emotional. Every day, I took painkillers for the constant discomfort in my bunions, and later for an ankle injury that became a constant companion.

So, you might wonder: if the environment was so stifling, why did I continue? Why not walk away? The answer lies in one simple truth: I felt free when I was dancing. Ballet was my escape, my sanctuary, the only place where I felt I could truly express myself. But as I approached the end of my training and graduated, I realized just how much that freedom had slipped away. I stood there, poised to pursue ballet full-time, but doubted whether I would ever be accepted into any professional companies. Despite my reservations, I was accepted into the Oklahoma City Ballet.

At first, it seemed like a dream come true. Yet, after a year of “living my dream,” I found myself asking a profound question just before a company class: Why am I standing here? I couldn’t answer. The question itself was a shock—because the truth was, I was burnt out, physically broken, and emotionally drained. I was missing the support of family and friends, having moved across the ocean alone, to this new land that years later would become my home. And the most painful realization was that I had lost the very reason I had started dancing in the first place. Years of unacknowledged damage had taken their toll. 

It was then that I knew I needed a change. I took a step back from the world I knew and went to Canada to live with family friends. They graciously welcomed me into their home, offering me the time and space to reflect on my life and decide whether to return to ballet or embrace a new path.

The internal battle I faced was intense. I couldn’t shake the urge to return to ballet, but every time I even thought about stepping into a studio or holding a barre, a sharp pain gripped my chest. I knew something had to change, but I wasn’t sure what that change would look like. Initially, I thought I might study Pilates to help other dancers strengthen their bodies, regain balance, and recover from injury. Yet life had a different plan for me.

During my time in Canada, I met an extraordinary yoga teacher who had developed his own unique methodology called Breathe Into Motion. Under his guidance, I began to experience profound physical relief from my pain, but more importantly, I started to feel balanced and at peace in a way I hadn’t in years. He taught me that healing is not just about the body—it is about the mind and spirit as well. Watching him heal and empower countless others, I found a renewed sense of purpose.

It was through his teachings that I discovered my true calling: to help others heal. To be a guide for those who are struggling—whether it’s physical pain, emotional exhaustion, or the overwhelming burden of self-doubt. His mentorship inspired me to pursue a path of healing, not just for myself, but for others as well.

Today, I look back at my journey with gratitude. It wasn’t always easy, and it certainly wasn’t linear, but it led me to a place where I can finally say that I’ve found true freedom—not in dance, but in helping others heal. If there is one thing I’ve learned, it’s this: the path to healing often begins with a pause—a moment to reflect, to rest, and to listen to what our bodies and hearts are truly telling us.

No matter how far you’ve strayed from your original purpose, it is never too late to rediscover it. Healing, growth, and freedom are all within your reach—sometimes, you just have to step back, breathe, and allow yourself to change.